a post so hot it's catching fire

24/11/2013

So over the past three days I have been bumming around and not really following my "YEAH LETS BE PRODUCTIVE" plan, so uh... whoops? Better get onto it, I guess.

But first let's procrastinate with a blogpost.

I'm not quite sure what I did on Thursday since I was operating on minimal sleep. What I do remember is that:

• Had lunch outside with a bunch of the IB students and it was nice
• Got maths paper 1 results back and I'm pleased (92%!!)
• Bio in p1 was really unproductive and a lot of us were just really hyper so Mrs O warned Ms Choi of our unproductiveness and Ms Choi in p6 let us have our lesson outside in the bright sunshine hehe

Friday:

1. Most of my classes consisted of doing nothing and just talking hahaha. In bio everyone was doing "silent work" on their computers but in reality 80% of us were playing the Doctor Who game on google hahahaa. Then in History we were doing our internal assessment research and I just went up to library with Lauren and Ruby and ended up chatting with Kellin and Sobitha about how fucked 12IB are for next year (yay). Then in English we did shit all and were just sitting down on the floor chatting (trying to convince Ms Moy to watch Mean Girls lol). Had TOK in p5 where we got our essay grades back and the highest mark anyone got was a C which was what I got so I was pretty stoked hahhahaha... low standards for TOK as you can see...

2. For some reason I was convinced to go to assembly which was held in the goddamn junior gym and it was just half of IB so i have no idea where the rest of us went. We just sat on the chairs reserved for teachers lol yolo mr allan came to get everyone to sing that rice patty cake song and everyone was soooo not into it lol

3. WENT TO WATCH CATCHING FIRE OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD IT WAS SO GOOD I CRIED ALL THROUGHOUT THE MOVIE I'M NOT EVEN JOKING I THINK I CRIED 7 DISTINCT TIMES IT WAS RIDICULOUS???? 

So, this was our "IB gathering" thing that I had tried to plan and considering only 12 people were able to come out of 31 I'm not sure to what extent I succeeded in coordinating the event but whatever we had fun and I personally enjoyed it heaps!!!!!!! Most people were late (including me) so we bought tickets at 7pm for the 8:15 showing, and most of us had to buy a ticket for a person who wasnt yet there. The people who went were me, Jo, Cherry, Elaine, Mei, Nicole, Izzy, Meilin, Micaella, Cerys, and Aneeka + Rebecca joined us for the movie. We went to dinner at Toto's and got two metre long pizzas which were fab, and had nice dinner conversations and selfie times hahaha. 

In natural fashion, we were cutting it incredibly close to the movie time and ended up sprinting from the restaurant to the cinemas and as a group of 10 teenagers I'm pretty sure we terrified the casual onlooker (new jogging club perhaps?). By the time we got to the movies and sat down at 8:19, we were all disgusting and sweaty and panting and it was just really amusing ok hahaha. AND THEN THE ADS WENT ON UNTIL 8:30 SO WE COULD'VE PRETTY MUCH WALKED AT A LEISURELY PACE TO THE CINEMA AND STILL WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN LATE FOR THE MOVIE!!!!!!!

But yes, the movie was fantastic. I agree with the people who think that the second movie was even better than the first. Then again, I enjoyed the second book more than the first. I got so freaked out at the monkey bit that I punched myself in the face lol gg everyone in our row started screaming (and i'm pretty sure our row was the only one heartily laughing at the jokes in the film). The elevator scene with Johanna was done perfectly!! I was wondering how well they could pull it off! I'm kinda sad they left out the morphling's fucked up blood flower on peeta's cheek because that really left an impact on me in the book and i was looking forward to it :'( but it's understandable i guess, since it's pretty gross. I think the fog was done perfectly and the arena was amazing and everything was so fast paced and thrilling and I could barely even catch my breath from the last traumatic thing before the next shit happened. Izzy and I were just frantically holding on to each other through most of the arena scenes and being like "NOPE NOT OKAY CANNOT HANDLE IT GIVE ME A BREAK". The peacekeepers were terrifying and the stuff from the victory tour was even better than in the book imo. ALL THE HAPPY SCENES WERENT EVEN HAPPY FOR ME BECAUSE I WOULD JUST START CRYING FROM THE KNOWLEDGE OF WHAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN TO THAT CHARACTER LATER ON IN THE MOVIE OR IN MOCKINGJAY??? KNOWLEDGE IS PAIN.

But yeah, good day.

Saturday:

• went to nicole's to do TOK and fucked around for the most part
• mei got there on time and nicole was still sleeping and home alone so mei was stuck outside for half an hour because nicole wasn't picking up the phone or opening the gate haahhaha
• 13 going on 30 is a terrible movie, wow

complacency and how to avoid it

20/11/2013

it's quarter to 2am on a school night and idk why i feel the need to do this but i really do think i need to write a blogspot today just to make my thoughts sink in.

so, results from exams have been given out and let's cut to the chase - i'm not happy about them lol. i'll still do my three positives of today, but i think that it's as important to reflect on one's failings as it is to celebrate one's successes, ya feel?

basically, i fucked up these exams by not studying. i really did screw myself over with that one, especially because it showed in my results. i know how you can feel cheated if you get bad marks after studying really hard, but when you cram for only 4 hours the night before (maths) or at the most for 12 hours the day before (bio) then you have no right to complain about your shitty scores.

and i'm not complaining - i'm reflecting ;D

the thing is, i - much like many others - have fallen into a pattern of doing well in exams without studying much. i studied less for these exams than i did for my mid years, and much less than for my lvl1s last year. i think i needed these results to hit me hard in order to make an impact.

ok but let's be real, for average standards my results aren't terrible. in fact i'm probably at the median right now holistically, and sure some of you will say that i'm stupid for being upset with that but whatever ok try to understand the fact that i am used to being near the top of the class so this kinda sucks for me. im p sure i made a similar comment in my mid years results blog post hahaha.

but the purpose of this post, i think, is to really make sure that i know that i need to get my shit together. i'm not upset about my results because i have no right to be and i was actually expecting a lot worse (fours) so that's why you didnt see me crying around school (i told myself that if i could make it through today without crying it would be a good day hahaha) (then again i've never really been one to publicly cry about my school marks except for that one time this year where i NEARLY did over a stupid ungraded french vocab test hahahaha dumb francais) but i dont think i can be happy about most of them. i think i can be okay and not depressed or obsessed, but simultaneously not satisfied -- u feel? i think that's healthy and i think as long as i dont replace that "i'm okay with this for the time being and am not going to freak out or drive myself crazy by making myself feel like i'm worthless/a failure (which is never healthy)" attitude with a sense of complacency then it's alg

3 bright rays of sunshine:

1. TOP OF TEH CLASS 4 ENGLISH (OH SHIT)

ok i just??????????????? wat?????????????? whattttttttt????????????????? yeah remember what i said about how important it is to reflect on the shit u did bad just like it's important to celebrate ur successes well HERE IS I CELEBRATING WOW??? MUCH CELEBRATION???? SUCH HAPPY??? VERY RESULTS WOW????? (im goign to read this post in 2 years time and hvae no idea why i was talking so weird, ok no i didnt have a stroke future!vicky, pls remember DOGE) ok so ms moy was discussing how english teachers rank the papers and i was sitting there like ah well that's depressing i dont want to be compared with everyone else in the class especially as there are such ridic amazing ppl in our class since it just emphasizes how much i didnt deserve the eng prize last year and ive actually been feeling really shitty in english this year and like im not doing very good in my prev-best subject?? so i think i really needed this boost??? i got a 19 out of 20 for the paper 1 which was what they ranked and ms moy said that i had the best understanding of the text in the class and i was like IS DIS REAL LIFE but trying to keep cool and not make an ass of myself (which is kinda what i am doing on this blog post atm but whatevs SAFE PLACE) but yeah mm im pretty stoked aye. not sure i deserve it lol but i'm not going to ruin a good thing with a negative attitude towards myself so YAY ENGLISH SUCCESSES!!!!!!!

also, this was really good because it was the first thing i told my parents when they asked about results and it cast a positive light on all my other shittier marks because they were just like "oh that's not bad, WOW VICKY U R SO AMAZING" and i was like hehe m a n i p u l a t i o n

2. ib closeness

i know one of the negs of ib is that you get cut off from the rest of the year level but at the same time you also get so close with the 30 people in your ib cohort and it's so lovely because we're just like one big very loud family who supports each other in breakdowns and panic attacks and see each other everyday in so many classes. in most of my classes in the years before, i never felt that sort of camaraderie, in fact most of the time i didn't feel comfortable in lots of my classes because i just never talked to half of the people in the class ever because we ran in different circles and sat on opposite sides of the class. i think art was the class where this was the least prominent due to the chill nature of the subject and the constant interaction with random people around the room, but everything else - english, maths (year 12s and yr11s in the class), bio, chem/phys, french - i never really got to know lots of people in the class. on the other hand, with IB, there's always some form of interaction with everyone and it's just so NICE. 

today's morning tea was extended due to the teachers having a thing, so lots of us just gathered in our french class and hung out (i can't say we "chilled" in the room because the atmosphere of that room wasn't "chill" it was "HYPER", so we ... hypered?). and then at lunch a portion of us sat out in the sun and whatnot. we're trying to organise an ib dinner + catching fire for friday night since exams are over, and i hope it actually happens hahaha i need it desperately

3. jades bday

couldn't do anything special for jade since she's still on exams and we have school atm, but i made a 10 page mock-powerpoint presentation thing (u know those ones on tumblr) but i fell asleep and had a long ass 4 hour nap which meant i posted it at like, 11:30pm with only 30 minutes left of her bday ugh i suck hahaha. also im regretting using up all my ammo of bad photos (for izzys bday as well) bcs NOW I HAVE NOTHING FOR 18THS NEXT YEAR UGH

here are a few of my fave slides

supermathematician

18/11/2013

maths tomorrow LAST ONE YEY
im fecked????????? like w o w guise exams are not going v well

1. french was today, it wasn't TOO bad, but i have very low standards for myself for french lol. not expecting good marks (i see a trend here with all my exams)

2. lol my brother dropped his phone into the toilet. this is the SECOND TIME

3. cathee was helping everyone out on the ib page with maths problems so i made a thing

analyse this, bitch!

13/11

MMM QUICK UPDATE TO WAKE ME UP:

THIS IS ALL IN CAPS BECAUSE I FEEL THAT THIS LANGUAGE DEVICE EFFECTIVELY SHOWS THE TONE OF THE NARRATOR BY EXPRESSING THE PANIC THAT THE NARRATOR FEELS CURRENTLY OVER HER STATE OF EXAMS. THE WRITER'S PURPOSE IN THIS TEXT IS TO HIGHLIGHT HOW FUCKED SHE IS FOR EXAMS AT THE MO AND HOW THIS IS VERY VERY VERY VERY BAD

1. I HAD HISTORY TODAY. THE HISTORY DPTMT WAS MEAN AND GAVE US A SHITLOAD OF QUESTIONS THAT WERE ALL QUESTIONS THAT WE HAVENT REALLY WRITTEN ESSAYS ON (IE NOT STRAIGHTFORWARD ONES LIKE "ANALYSE THE CAUSES OF A CIVIL WAR' INSTEAD IT WAS "ANALYSE THE SOCIAL, ECONOMIC, AND POLITICAL POLICIES OF A TWENTIETH CENTRUY WAR" AND I WAS LIKE ERRRRRR PANIC PANIC PANIC UM HOLD ON HOW IS THIS A POSITIVE THING I CANT REMEMBER UH WELL I DID FINISH IN TIME, WHICH WAS GOOD? BUT I WAS SO STRESSED OUT AND OVERWHELMED BY THE END OF IT THAT MY HANDWRITING WAS SO FAINT AND SHAKY AND MY HAND WASN'T PHYISCALLY ABLE TO MOVE ANY FASTER AND I GENUINELY FELT LIK I WAS GOING TO PASS OUT LIKE NOT EVEN A JOKING EXAGGERATION OF "HEHE WAS GONNA PASS OUT" BUT LEGITIMATELY FELT LIGHT HEADED AND LIKE I WAS SEEING BLACK SPOTS IN MY VISION AND SHIT . HISTORY WAS A BAD DECISION PEOPLE

2. WENT TO LIBRARY TODAY AND GOT SO IN THE ZONE FOR CHEM AND THEN FINISHED MY TEST PAPER AND THEN GOT SO OUT THE ZONE LOL I HAD TO MOVE SEATS CUZ THE GUY BEHIND ME WAS DOING A WEIRD THING WHERE HE WAS MUTTERING AND WHIMPERING TO HIMSELF AND IT WAS REALLY DISTRACTING SO I MOVED ELSEWHERE AND THERE WERE REALLY HOT GUYS THERE AND THAT WAS REALLY DISTRACTING AS WELL SO UH YEAH NOT REALLY EFFICIENT STUDY FOR AN HOUR OR SO

3. MUM JUST DELIVERED ME SOME STRAWBERRIES INTO MY ROOM WHICH WOKE ME UP SO GOD BLESS HER



I HAD ENG SCHOL ON TUESDAY. LETS NOT TALK ABOUT IT.... BIO SCHOL TOMORROW AND IB ENGLISH EXAM HEHEHE IM SO FUCKED IM GONNA CRY. GUESS HOW MUCH CHEM IVE GONE THROUGH? ONE TOPIC. OUT OF NINE. GUESS HOW MUCH BIO IVE GONE THROUGH? ONE AND A HALF TOPICS. OUT OF EIGHT. GUESS WHEN THOSE EXAMS ARE? FRIDAY.... HA HAH HAHA H AH A H AH A HA HAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA


IN OTHER NEWS, LACHIE ASKED MEI WHO SHE WAS/HOW THEY KNEW EACH OTHER IN FACEBOOK CHAT AND SHE PANICKED TO THE POINT WHERE SHE SWITCHED OFF HER WIFI AND 3G TO MAKE SURE SHE APPEARED OFFLINE HAHAHAHA AND SHE STILL HASNT REPLIED IM STILL LAUGHING ABOUT IT TBH

labyrinth of books and caffeine-strung students

10/11/2013

hello friends! once again i have neglected u for a wee while but dont fret i am here again!!! hopefully i will be able to continue this through exam week (heh who am i kidding)

i have been sleeping at 2am every night which is honestly confuddling me because i don't know how i fell into this habit, but i think im going to make a conscious effort to sort out my sleeping schedules from today on. TODAY!!!!! I HVE WRITTEN IT DOWN AND IT IS IN THE BLOGOSPHERE AND IT IS GOING TO HAPPENNNNNNN

1. went to library for some study (after bio schol which was kinda not that useful tbh, and i was half an hour late) and i was very productive!!!! finally got my shit together for bio's chem of life topic so um, 2 topics down, 5 more to go??? ha. haha. im so screwed. like amy said today, at this point, our studying is more "damage control" to minimise the extent of failing in the exams, rather than studying for excellent marks

2. at the library not only was nicole and i there, but jade had been there with lauren since 9ish, and later mei popped in and surprised nicole and i, and then i got a snapchat where cherry was like "in general library" and i was like wtf where r u sO AM I and she was on the fourth floor (whereas i was on the fifth) and later when nicole and i went downstairs to find her i think she was sitting directly under where i was sitting on the level above!!!

also, nicole and i were coming back up from visiting cherry and i went into the bathroom while she went ahead back to our desks, but when i came out of the cubicle she was standing there and i was like "er what are u doing" and she was like ".... i dont know where we were sitting. i got lost...." and i fucking died hahahaha u literally have two options of turn left or turn right and she turned right instead of left and was like "this isnt right?" and just didnt bother to go to the left side omg

3. it was a really nice day and nicole and i had lunch out in albert park under a cute tree and ate sushi and tested each other on organic chem hehehe romantic

#4 OH OHOH OH when i was waiting for my mum to pick me up (my bus was due in 20 minutes hell no not waiting for that amount of time... ive been spoiled by 10 minute b-line waits lol) i went into starbucks to do a bit of chem reading while i waited, and there was this guy sitting in front of me-ish and he was on his laptop and he got up and left his seat and his laptop was still open on this chick's facebook page whose dp and cover photo were both professional-looking photos of her in lingerie posing sexily on a bed and i was like TRYING TO CONTAIN MY LAUGHTER?????? scuse me 40 year old man watchu doin bro at least change tabs or something hahaha. at least he's taking full advantage of starbucks' free wifi



how did my extra #4 become longer than all my other 3 things........

the irony of stressing over studying stress

5/11/2013

Oops i forgot to do one yesterday :( I've really fallen out of the rhythm of this!!

1. in the midst of doing 5 hours of french for tomorrows interactive oral exam and even though i'm still thoroughly screwed for tomorrow and in no way feeling prepared, i think the amount of writing + planning ive done today has been really helpful in terms of my writing ability which is of course, good for exams. So, unintentional study, I guess? I really do enjoy french when I'm doing it at my own pace and am allowed the freedom to screw up and speak slowly and use google translate hahaha. It's just in class where I feel a little shitty about my capabilities. Hopefully I'll get into habits of putting more work into french and it'll pay off? I've always found that I never really put much effort into studying for French so that explains why it's one of my worst subjects. Interesting how the cycle is: good at subject -> likes subject -> spends more time on subject -> improves on subject -> consistently good at subject but being bad at a subject just leads to being consistently bad at the subject.... Humans are weird, man.

2. a thing happened today in the reading room that made me happy although it followed a not-very-happy thing but it involved a sweet note folded into a paper plane that was flown to me :')

3. i think(hope) i helped out a friend today over something really significant and it's not really a "positive" thing but it's something i really really am glad I did.

knowledge on homoerotic subtext will always come in handy

3/11/13

Today was my mum's birthday! Happy Birthday Mum!!!!!!!!!

1. Chillin with ma mere in the morning and giving her my card (i wrote a cute lame juvenile-rhyming poem for her) and then later tonight lol'ing about pregnancy and giving birth (since it's her BIRTHday) over birthday cheesecake hehe

2. At eng schol workshop, teacher was trying to get us to say what the word was when there are hidden meanings in a text and I suddenly thought of "homoerotic subtext" and said "subtext" and it was right and i was trying so hard not to laugh ONCE AGAIN HOMOEROTIC SUBTEXT COMES IN TO SAVE THE DAY god bless my education from supernatural

3. eng schol workshop was actually very helpful but i have been reminded of how unprepared and shitty i am compared to everyone else who takes it and was at the workshop, which is rather concerning but i hope i can cram enough in a weeks time to be up to standards???? fuck hahaha