this is for bad days, to remind me what good days feel like

despite the risk of sounding as a sappy, really really bad 'poet' (i really don't intend it to be that way) this is how it's gonna come across.

today was a day inspired by 'wonderment and awe'.
and it all started with the clear blue sky.

at 7:30am while i was at netball training, i look up into the sky and see blue
i finish netball and i see my face rosy from running laps and hair messy, and i look alive. and i appreciate it.
i get to atrium and try to find my friends, figuring that someone i knew would probably be in the library. i head into the reading room and see lizzi and maddi. i sit there in the silence, and i appreciate the quiet companionship.

first period english consists of silent reading our novel. i face the window, and look up from my book, distracted by the blue, blue sky and the green, green trees. i get mocked (nicely) by the people at my table for the smile that slowly spread out on my face as i looked outside. i appreciate the blue, the green, and the teasing.

i go to do the australian maths test. as i line up, i feel the cold, i complain, but i appreciate it. i sit inside, in a big old hall, with a test paper in front of me. i do the best i can, and i feel as if i did well. i smile at the paper everytime i work out a problem that i didn't think i could do, and i appreciate the challenge.

i have morning tea, i have maths. i go to art and i stuff one of my earphone buds (that lizzi got me from thailand) in my left ear and give lizzi the other one. i appreciate the gift that she got me, and she draws my profile instead of doing her cubism work. i admire her talent and i appreciate that she draws me in a positive light instead of what i know i really look like. other people in the class admire my art, and i appreciate the compliments.

the lunch bell rings, and i meet joanna. we go to practice our song for talent quest but find out there are no rooms available. she drags me and my bags to go practice in the pe changing rooms. i refuse, and stop under a blossoming tree. i look up, and see the flourishing buds, and i smile goofily. i appreciate the fact that i can act like a freak and my friends don't judge me. i appreciate the white blooms against the perfect backdrop of the blue azure. (i appreciate the thesaurus because i needed to find a different word to sky)

we become lazy and eat lunch under the tree. i take a picture of the tree against the sky because i can't get over how beautiful it is. i admire the way the sunlight hits the tree branches, highlighting them, and i tell joanna and she thinks i'm high. we stand up, preparing to go find a place to practice but we get distracted by our lame silly jokes. We both laugh until we're doubled over. i appreciate it. we sing loudly and freely at people passing by. they look at us strangely and we laugh. i appreciate that too.

i have a singing lesson with cathee. cathee yawns, i yawn, and it's a vicious cycle. our singing teacher doesn't care about the fact that we don't give a shit about jazz and don't suit it either way. i yawn, cathee yawns. we understand each other. i appreciate it. i admire cathee's singing, i admire our teachers, i try and fail a bit, but i tried, and that's what's important, i decide.

i have science and it's basically a lesson of goofing around. we touch skulls, human, animal and plastic. i appreciate it, and i hold the human skull in awe. we mess around with eyedroppers and mysterious shot glasses of different liquids, testing them on our test buds to see which sides of the tongue is most reactant to which. our faces scrunch up in disgust when the saltwater and lemon juice(disguised as orange juice) hits our palates with unwelcome and sudden explosions of salt and sour. we laugh the whole lesson, and i appreciate it.

i ride home in my car. i appreciate so many things. i appreciate the music blaring in my ears that blocks everything out, in which i lose myself to, and sing along badly stumbling along the lyrics. i appreciate the blue cloudless sky again and i tell my mum how much i appreciate it. she says she's seen skies that are bluer, but i don't care or mind. it's blue enough for me.

i admire the patches of light peeking through the trees as i pass underneath. i admire the wind coming through the window and the way it whips my hair across my face. i get to the top of the steep slope on landscape road and i gaze at the view just for a moment and as we go rolling downhill. i appreciate the small puffy clouds in the distance - the imperfections in the big wide clear sky. i like that it's not perfect anymore. i like the clouds. i think to myself, the clouds look like they're running. running and tumbling.

we drive past mt roskill shops. i admire the dirty banners of the dairies, the tagging in places that make you wonder how they got up there. i admire the barber shop sign flapping in the wind. i appreciate that it has character. a long dragon-like queue of cars block our entrance into our garage, and i appreciate the man who stops and lets us turn into our driveway, after having 15 or so cars keep driving without stopping for us, as we wait there indicating right, patiently.

i get home, go up to my room and see a letter on my desk from NZ transport and know it's my learners license. i tear the letter open haphazardly and remove the card from the paper, and i cringe and laugh at my picture on it- one that makes me look like i have jaundice and where i'm half smirking instead of smiling. the picture makes me look like i'm thinking 'yeah bitch, take my photo, i'm fierce'. i appreciate it because it has attitude, and i appreciate it because the license finally came. and then i laugh at myself when the music that's  still blaring in my ears makes a sudden loud noise and i jump in my seat as my heart skips a beat. but my hearts beating, proof that i'm alive and i appreciate it.